I Ain't No Home Schooler
Over the years, I have had the opportunity to meet some brilliant home schooling moms online. While reading them, I've always been in awe of their dedication and creativity. Never once have I questioned whether or not these women were doing what was best for their children. Their good intentions seemed as clear as the words on their pages and I knew that the families involved were reaping the many benefits of their hard work.
Recently, I had an encounter with an entirely different animal.
I met an extended family member for the first time over the weekend. She's a 30 year old mother of four that began home schooling her 5 and 7 year old daughters this year. My initial impression was a good one. Here was a mother taking the time to make sure her children's education was a top priority. I began to ask her a few questions about how she managed what, in my opinion, seems to be such a challenging yet gratifying lifestyle. I was not being judgmental. On the contrary, I was very interested in learning more about her and her daily life.
"Do you have a schedule that you follow?", I asked.
"No, we just learn as we go."
"Do you find that you need a lot of planning time for the lessons?"
"Not really."
"How long is your school day?"
"I can usually get a whole day's worth of teaching into a couple hours a day."
"Really? Wow. Is it challenging to organize social situations and learning field trips for the girls?"
"Well, I don't do much of that because we don't have a car during the day."
"Oh."
It was clear that she was becoming uncomfortable with the conversation but she continued, "I never did very good in school. I figure that this is my chance for me to learn too, you know."
"Oh", I said while trying to keep my face looking normal.
"What about middle school and high school? I mean, my 7th grader comes home with math problems that make me want to shoot myself." (AND I DID VERY WELL IN SCHOOL, I wanted to say)
"I don't know. I'm sure I can learn that stuff too."
"Learn it well enough to teach it?"
"Why not?" She was getting pissed. "Math may be tough but I'm really good in reading and writing. English was always my strong soup." (yes, she said soup)
At that point, my mother thankfully swooped in and saved me from what was about to become a down and dirty version of Are You Smarter Than A Hillbilly Home Schooler?" I'm far from a teacher or an expert on the subject but the situation made me squirm in my chair.
After spending more time than I wanted with her, it was pretty clear that she didn't take great care of her kids. One morning after I made my 8 year old a measly bowl of cereal, she said,
"You are a really good mom. I don't ever make my kids breakfast. They can have whatever they want as long as they can get it themselves."
Wow...ummmm, these kids are 5 and 7. What the hell?
Now I ask you: Can just anyone home school? What if they don't have the best intentions? What if they are just using the system? What if they are as dumb as a box of rocks? What if they are a selfish, lazy, crappy mom toying with the most precious thing on earth - a child's bright future?
What I've learned: I may not be as driven and creative as those home schooling moms that I put on a pedestal but my girls are thriving, dammit. I got a peek at the dark side of the equation and it was very sad.
