The Best Parenting Advice I Ever Received

The first time I became a parent it was with little warning.  We had been married just about nine months and the call came out of the blue on a Friday afternoon. 

On Sunday, we had a three and a half year old.

No matter how you become a parent, you're never really prepared.  But in this situation, we really weren't.  We hadn't applied to adopt.  On occasion, our dog got a bowl of Cheerios if we hadn't had a chance to make it to the grocery store.  Friends were still regularly crashing at our house after a late night out. 

I had plenty of babysitting experience, but taking care of a child full-time? 

I just didn't want to ruin this little guy's life, so I turned to the parent I knew the best--my mom.

My mom is a humble woman.  Not surprisingly, her response to my plea for answers was simple and under-stated.

"In no way am I one to be giving parenting advice, so I will just say try to keep your sense of humor."

Um.  Okay.

Two months after our son arrived, he went to the bathroom on his own and next thing we knew he was back quietly playing in his room.

"Hey sweetie, do you need help cleaning up?"

"No.  I did it myself."

Husband and I whip our necks around to stare horrified at each other.

There was no way I could be prepared for what I encountered.

Poop was everywhere!  Smudges on the toilet seat, hand prints on the walls, foot prints on the floor.  There was poop in places I still haven't figured out how he reached. 

I ran to his room and picked him up under the shoulders trying not to get any poop on me and deposited him in the tub.

"Don't move.  Don't touch anything.  Just stand there!"

My mind was racing.  I was trying not to gag.  I didn't know what to tackle first, the poop-covered kid or the poop-covered bathroom--and then I heard my mom's voice in my head.  "Try to keep your sense of humor."

It started as a giggle and exploded into a full-on belly laugh.  Tiny poop hand prints on the wall really were funny.  And he was just standing in the tub not seeming to notice that he was covered in poop.  Frankly,  I think he was wondering what all the fuss was.  He just wanted to get back to his Rescue Heroes.  

This was all before I had babies and before I would find out just how many times one, as a mother, can be peed on, pooped on, thrown up on.

Now that little guy is almost a teenager.  He has two little brothers, and I've seen more poop than a proctologist (excuse me, colorectal surgeon).  My parenting challenges have grown far beyond a poop-covered kid, but my mom's advice remains the best I've ever received.  Whenever I'm tempted to scream or cry, I try to remember to laugh and it usually puts everything into the proper perspective.

*****

Amie Adams laughs quite a bit as the mother of three rambunctious boys.  She blogs for DC Metro Moms and also on her personal blog MammaLoves...