I am finally learning to say "No."

I grew up in a very involved household - involved in everything from the PTA to local politics to work. My family was not only involved in school stuff, but also kid, family, and friend stuff too. I guess a lot of that rubbed off, because I found myself in the midst of a very over scheduled three weeks, with barely any time to breathe. Between the end of school, PTA, Art Reach, MOMS Club, soccer, make-up soccer games, gymnastics, playgroup, and general family stuff, I was sinking faster than I could ever imagine. I had been up to the school for two solid days (with the baby in tow), after spending about six days organizing volunteers for various events at school, along with attending all sorts of school and playgroup events. Add to that several nights of not enough sleep due to some very late school activity nights and some slight insomnia, and I realized that something had to give. But there was a problem. I couldn't say "no" - to anyone.

I am a SAHM, and part of my "job," or at least part of what I consider to be my responsibility is to volunteer - supporting my kids, my family, and my friends. I even feel that I need to pick up some for the parents who are working full time - since I am home during the day and am available, I've always just said "yes." Well, I guess that I wasn't able to draw the line to keep myself from being over-committed, and I went sailing right across it. I hit rock bottom when I realized that I had volunteered at a blood drive at the same time that one of my kids had a performance at school, that my hubby wasn't going to make it, and that I was also doing five other things that day, all this starting at 6am. Aside from the fact that I'm not a morning person, I'd be donating blood, and helping out at the drive early in the morning (again with a baby in tow). Then I'd have to head off to school, then back to the blood drive, and in the midst of this get the baby to physical therapy and pop in on that performance at school if I could sneak away early from the blood drive. And this was a slow day this week. Not sure where it went south, but at some point yesterday I realized that if I didn't say "No" to an activity this evening around dinnertime, my kids would not only not get fed, but my husband would have to scrape me off of the floor this evening. So, I actually said "No." when I got a phone call this afternoon verifying that I was not attending this meeting tonight. And I didn't give any excuse other than that I was tired and I just couldn't add another thing to my schedule today. For the first time I said "no"to someone who was asking my to do something that I really did want to do, and for the first time I don't feel guilty that I wasn't pulling my fare share.  Who knew that it would take until well into my 30's for me to realize that being a super-mom doesn't mean doing it all, but that in order to even survive I have to take care of myself first.

So tomorrow, instead of going to field day at school and helping out, I think I'll just pop in and drop off the water that I'm supposed to bring. Maybe take a few pictures, then leave. Yes, actually go home and  *gasp* do nothing. Might have to amend that a bit. Maybe I'll take a nap. It's been a rough three weeks and I've learned a big lesson.  

This is an original DC Metro Moms post.

Suzie also blogs over at Confessions of a Not So Well Behaved Woman about these new life lessons she's learning.