Happy Fourth Birthday, Four Times

Originally published on DC Metro Moms on August 12, 2009 but republished in honor of today's topic day - Celebrating More Birthdays.

My son celebrated his first fourth birthday last Wednesday while we were at the shore with my in-laws.  My mother-in-law kindly brought along race car decorations and a Happy Birthday sign and “goodies” for the small party goers—my two daughters and their young cousin.  We brought a few small gifts for him, as did his aunt and uncle and grandparents.  Before we left for our week-long vacation, six hours from home, we baked cupcakes to take along for his “beach birthday”. 

Tomorrow is my son’s actual birthday, and it will be his second fourth birthday party.  He knows the month and date; he's known the date from the time he was two, and ever since summer began, he asked us just about every day if tomorrow was his birthday.  As our “summer baby”, he also knows that his birthday is in the summertime—when school’s out, the sun shines hot, and when we swim at the pool every afternoon.

So tomorrow—on his real birthday--we will have cake at our house, we’ll blow up some balloons, we’ll sing again, and he’ll open a couple more presents from his immediate family.  Mom, Dad, his sisters, and Golden and Guinea will eat a special “birthday dinner” of our big guy’s choosing (probably hot dogs, his most favorite) and the ice-cream cake he’s been talking about for months now.

But it doesn’t—it can’t--stop there. 

On Wednesday, we’ll have his third fourth birthday party.  We will bring cupcakes and decorations to our pool so that a few of our friends and their kids—and his other aunt and uncle—can sing “Happy Birthday” to our now officially 4-year-old son.  This year, we’re laying low with his party because last year he cried for most of it, being that he isn’t a fan of being the center of attention and, of course, he skipped his nap that day. 

With our everyday pool pals invited and just a buddy or two from preschool, this will be a low-key event, with Speed Racer decorations, snacks for our little party-goers, and very, very small goodie bags for the invitees.  If I can even muster up the energy to do them between now and then. 

That’s three fourth birthday parties down, but a whole other side of the family hasn’t officially marked my son’s fourth birthday.  I’m from Pennsylvania, a three hour hop away from our home here in the DC Metro area.  My mom and dad and two other sisters and their significant others have yet to coordinate a time when we can get together for—I can hardly believe I’m typing this—a fourth fourth birthday party, complete with cake and ice-cream and more singing “Happy Birthday” to our precious son, the only boy in the family, the only grandson, the solo nephew. 

I know it’s too much.  We’ve done this for five years now (give or take a few parties, depending on flu season, the weather, and other outside  events) for  our daughter, who is five, my son, nearly four, and my youngest daughter, who is two.  But I’m not sure how to fix it without having hurt feelings somewhere—my side of the family, my husband’s, or our close friends who have been there to mark these happy times, these many, many celebrations.   

Granted, there have been years when things have worked out beautifully and everyone was free on one golden weekend day for one perfect, all-grandparents-included, all-siblings-included, all-friends-and-their-kids-included, wonderful, blissful birthday.   Actually it was only once—for my oldest daughter’s very first birthday.   One time out of the eleven birthdays we’ve been so lucky to celebrate with our children.  Holy moly.

I’m sure my husband and I could come up with some rational solution to this madness if we weren’t so busy planning parties. 

This is an original DC Metro Moms post.

 

Always looking for excuses to eat more cake and ice-cream, Amy M. writes at teachmama, where she shares the cool ways she tries to sneak in a little bit of learning into her three children’s lives every day.