Things That Go Bump In The Night

Driving home on a dark and rainy night something zoomed onto the road right in front of my car. There was no way I could safely swerve to avoid it. Braking on the slick road wasn't an option. The other lane wasn't clear either. My heart sank as I heard the small thump and felt the bump under the wheels of my minivan. My mother and my son were in the car with me. I did my best to quickly channel Mr. Rogers and I prepared myself for the questions which would no doubt begin after my son heard the bump.  Only he wasn't the one with all the questions. It was my mother.

Baba: What was that?

Me: It was a raccoon. It just ran right out into the road, I couldn't avoid it safely.

Baba: Why was it crossing the road?

Me: Not sure. Maybe no one ever told it "Cross at the green, not in between."

Son: Baba, I know why.

Baba: You do? Really?  Why?

Son: To get to the other side.

Everyone groans.

Me: I feel terrible. I'm going to make a donation to the World Wildlife Fund. This is only the second animal I have ever hit, the first happened when I was 17 years old.  It was also a dark night and also a raccoon. When I hit that one, I made a donation to the World Wildlife Fund. Damn-it. I feel awful.  Poor thing. There should be a special kind of  Mourner's Kaddish for this sort of thing.

Baba: Why was the raccoon out this late?

Me: Raccoons are nocturnal. They tend to be out at night. You know, because they are nocturnal.

Baba: Yes, but what was it doing near the road?

Me: Um. I don't know. Bad peripheral vision? I doubt it was a suicide.

Son: Maybe it was very old and had outlived it's friends and family.

Baba: I can understand that. I think this is a good time to remind you all I never want to be put in a nursing home.

Me: Mom, let's be clear about one thing,  I'm not hitting you with my minivan to avoid that.

Devra helps keep the lines of communication open across all generations over at Parentopia

An original DC Metro Moms Blog Post