Doing it right the second time around: A positive postpartum experience
My dear baby girl is six weeks old and I am proud and elated to say that I am doing really well. People can't believe that I was driving so quickly and wearing actual jeans within three weeks, but let me say, I worked hard for this! And also, they were maternity jeans. I am physically and mentally in a much better place than I was after my son was born when I was hurled into the dark hole of postpartum depression. It took that awful experience to know how to plan well for this period of time so that I could experience my children, take care of myself and accept the new challenges, sleeplessness and the host of physical awkwardness that is the postpartum period.
I would be a fool not to admit that sure, I was scared of being wildly pitched into that dark place once again where I hated myself and my body, felt tunnel visioned by the sleeplessness and quaked with anxiety every day. I was afraid of being so consumed with worry that I wouldn't be able to just relax and enjoy my new baby and my new and larger family. If you have experienced postpartum depression, or even just a bad case of blues, it doesn't have to repeat with each child, you can do it differently the second time around. I am so glad that I had the courage to make this time different.
I cannot believe how much I love my baby girl, how close I feel to her and how easy this mothering thing really is the second time. Yes, I now have two children, a wild toddler boy and this delicate, usually-sleeping baby girl. When they are both awake they are usually climbing on my body or attached to me in some way.
For starters, I didn't gain a half-ton of weight with this pregnancy. I gained exactly 30 pounds and that allowed me to wear normal maternity clothes right up until the end and I loved my pregnant body, with the exception of the migraines, acne and profuse sweating. This means that at six weeks postpartum I am within ten pounds of my starting weight and even though my regular jeans don't fit me yet without some horrific muffin-top situation, I am feeling strong and confident that I will look even better very soon. I'm eating well too which is a far cry from last time when I munched the day away with M&Ms because they gave me short little bursts of energy which were necessary when I had only been sleeping in 90 minute increments for three months.
I'm also medicated. I was medicated through pregnancy and medicated afterward and I swear to the moon and back, medication has saved me more than once before and it is allowing me now to enjoy my new life with my two kids.
I still have a mooshy sharpei-belly and I'm wearing pads in my bra to keep random let-down a secret, I don't always get a shower each day and sometimes I don't brush my teeth until well past noon, but I am choosing to embrace these frustrating issues as part of the experience. I know this period of time will pass and very soon I'll be missing these baby days as I shower alone and undisturbed.
No, I take that back, I can't wait to shower alone.
This is an original posting to DC Metro Moms.
Stacy Kravitz blogs as The Fabulous Miss. S



