DC Metro Moms

(Car) Size Matters

I haven’t had an unobstructed view of the road since 1998.

Before you go calling the cops to report some crazy lady driving around with seriously screwed up vision or something, let me explain.  I drive a Honda Civic.  It’s small, it’s efficient, I can park it anywhere, and it perfectly suited my needs as a single girl in her 20s.  It’s not quite as perfect in my current mode as 30-something suburban mother, but it’s fine. The car seat fits in the back, the stroller fits in the trunk along with a few grocery bags, and the gas mileage is still good. Plus I don’t have the money for a new car and this one is paid off. So, until the day it dies and I have no choice, the Civic is my mode of transportation.  And I like it.  It’s a fun little red car and driving around in it with the sunroof open and the music playing still makes me really, really happy.

But, boy, does it sit low to the ground.  Especially compared to the fleet of minvans and SUVs that have taken over the roads since I bought my Civic 13 years ago.

Homesick in a New Home

For the first two years of my son’s life, we lived on Capitol Hill.  For those of you who haven’t lived there, it’s an almost magical place to have kids.  I can’t speak to the Hill of yesteryear but it’s now a neighborhood loaded with young families, large and small parks, fantastic activities, pleasant amenities like organic grocery stores and child-friendly cafes, and the famous Moms on the Hill online community.

 It was to this little urban utopia that I brought my son home.  And it’s where I first ventured into the world of Mom. When I was home on maternity leave, I went to the weekly Moms on the Hill playgroups and became part of a small network of first-time moms with kids the same age as mine.  When C. started daycare at a center near our house, my circle expanded to the other neighborhood families whose kids were at the same center.  There were playdates on the weekends, chance meetings at the many playgrounds we frequented, picnics and cookouts with other families, my book club, and of course, the round of birthday parties. It was a happy place to be raising a baby and we loved the community feel of walking around the neighborhood with our stroller and running into people we knew.

A Letter to Michelle Obama

Dear Mrs. Obama,

I know I’m kind of late welcoming you to town but someone told me that Secret Service wasn’t going to just let me stroll up to your front door with a casserole.  Also, I’m a working mother living here in the DC area and that means life is busy and complicated.  But you already knew that, didn’t you?  You did the whole working mom gig in Chicago and now you’re doing it here.

I’ve gotta say, Mrs. Obama (or can I call you Michelle?  I think I’ll call you Michelle because it’s much easier to type), I am amazed at the grace with which you handle your life here in DC. I’m sure that in some ways, this is easier than the way things were back in Chicago when your husband was working out of town and you were trying to manage a career and two school-age kids by yourself.  And then your husband decided he wanted to change jobs and got mired in the longest, most harrowing, and most obsequious job interview process ever.  One that came with death threats to your family. And you never showed the strain.  You showed up when you needed to show up, you were funny when you needed to be funny, and you shielded your girls from the utter zaniness of it all so beautifully.  

Then you all packed up and moved to DC in what I’m sure was the most surreal moving process ever. How does that work?  Did you pack your own dishes and framed photos and the girls’ summer clothes on your own or did someone show up and take over all those details for you?  I know you got a walk through of the house before you moved and I know Jenna and Barbara Bush showed your girls their rooms, which I thought was one of the loveliest gestures in the history of Presidential transitions and the kind of touch only women could come up with and why are men still in charge when it’s women who manage all the fine details? Sorry. Got sidetracked there.  

Got books?

Last week I went to the launch of a great new charity called WeGiveBooks.org that donates books to a number of organizations that distribute books to children who need books.  The press conference was informative and I was very excited to be learning about the site when the organizer said something startling: The DC Public Schools would soon be coming on board as a recipient of books.

Hold the freakin’ phone, people!  How bad off is a school district if it has to be one of the only US recipients of charity books?  Pretty damn bad, methinks.

Let’s talk a little about DC.  This is a highly educated community and the white-collar population of the whole region continues to grow.  It has the second lowest unemployment rate of any of the United States (despite not really being a state with voting representation but that’s another rant for another day). It has the highest per capita income of any of the states.  And yet the school system is so under-supported that it needs to go begging for books.

Riding on the Metro-o-o...

Many of you commuting parents know the drill.  House to car to train to daycare to train to office to train to daycare to train to car to house. It’s a long day for everyone involved and whenever commuting parents complain about commuting, others just nod gravely.  Because really?  Who enjoys the commute?

My son.  That’s who.

As a mom, commuting looks like an obstacle course littered with opportunities for a small boy to lose it.  Did Daddy ruthlessly walk him away from the diggers he was watching outside the parking deck in the name of getting to work on time?  Cue the tears.  Did Mommy say she wouldn’t buy him a banana in Union Station on the way home?  Unfair! Does he want to get out of the stroller, in the stroller, far, far away from the stroller and some dumb parent doesn’t get it? Clue in, Mommy.  Clue in.

But the reality of commuting is never as bad as my fears of toddler melt-downs make it seem. In truth, C. has adjusted to his daily metro time beautifully.  It’s me who has the problem.  I sit on the train, a bundle of nerves with a BlackBerry and hope C. will behave himself. 

An Open Letter To DC Tourists

Hello!  Welcome to DC!  We hope you had a nice trip in from wherever you started. You’re really going to love this vacation and we’re very excited to have you here in the DC region.  For one thing, we have lots of beautiful, interesting, and fun activities here in the Nation’s Capital and we love to share them.  For another, we could use the money you spend here.  Not to be callous or anything.  It’s not just your money we like, it really is you, personally.

Before you start out on your DC sightseeing adventure, I’d like to share with you a few little tips that will make your visit more pleasant for you and more hassle-free for the residents you’ll interact with as you explore the area.

1.    Many of you have been to places like Disneyland and Williamsburg where cheerful cast members dress in costumes appropriate to their surroundings and spend their days helping you and your family navigate around.  Here in DC, you’ll see people who seem to be dressed as lawyers, lobbyists, government employees, cab drivers, parents, and other city residents.  Unlike a living history exhibit, these people are actually lawyers, lobbyists, government employees, cab drivers and parents.  They live and work here and are not part of the entertainment. They are not animatronic. And they are not on vacation like your family.  They are busy people with places to go.  So please!  If you see someone who looks like they’re in a hurry, assume that they really are in a hurry and move out of their way. 

Hip to be Square? Nope.

I haven't been to a movie since 2008

That’s right.  The last movie I saw in a theatre was Leatherheads at a mom movie showing while I was on maternity leave with my son. Who is now two years old.  It wasn’t a very good movie, by the way.  Mostly because of Renee Zellweger, if you ask my opinion.  I know there are people who love her.  I am not among them.  I want to feed her something starchy and get her into the shade so she can stop squinching her face into a little ball with her eyes mostly shut and her lips squashed right up under her nose.  Her face looks like it’s making a fist.

But at least I know who Renee Zellweger is.  I can't really say the same thing about anyone in the cast of Gossip Girl.  They all fall into a vague category of Young Pretty People Who Are Famous But I Don't Know Why. Some of them are actors or singers and I get that. But what about the others?  Like Heidi Montag.  Who is she?  Why is she famous?   I don't understand.